God Just Hears a Melody

I've been slightly more emotional lately and to those of you who don't know me, that means that I might actually share what's on my mind and even the emotions that go with the thoughts. My overemotional self comes off a bit differently everyday. Sometimes it means I cry and then feel fine and sometimes I'm just super aware of my emotions, it just depends :) . Today I was to the point of tears, not because I was stressed, but because my roommates were stressed and hurting. Let me explain.

My roommates play volleyball here at UW and, like our soccer spring training (off season technically), there is a lot of lifting and conditioning. Thankfully NCAA has a lot of rules on how many hours teams can meet to train with and without a coach in the off season but there are ways to get around. Coaches do things like forcing the players to set up their own training and making them "optional" (but they're definitely not). Then to get around the rules that make it illegal for the coaches to be with the team for more than so many hours a week the coaches just "stop by" for a few minutes during the afore mentioned optional trainings. DESPITE WHAT PEOPLE SAY, RULES ARE NOT ALWAYS MEANT TO BE BROKEN! So on top of the weights and conditioning that every team does these "optional" trainings end up making for more hours of training in the off season than in actual season. It's ILLEGAL, exhausting, and like my roommates, I'm tired of it.

Everyday my rommies come home they're stressed and nearly crying because they're expected to train more and more but since its labeled "optional" the coaches won't get in trouble with NCAA. The rules are meant to protect the players are getting bent and broken and no one but the players seem to care. I know where they're coming from because our coaches do the same thing and so does every other program but it doesn't make it any less exhausting physically or mentally. I'm tired of coming home after a long day only to hear my rommies expressing how broken their bodies and minds are but it's unavoidable. I know it's healthy to vent and BELIEVE ME I love being there for them but I wish there was a way for us to confront the problem either by bringing it up to the coaches or the athletic administration because we know the problems won't solve themselves. Our sports are becoming miserable not just challenging AND I just want to see them happy while enjoying college and volleyball and I want to be doing the same.

But we'll keep smiling and continue to use comic relief to keep us from breaking down :) We know it will get easier but for now we'll just keep pushing.

It's sad that I don't actually have a real picture of all my roommates or even just two of us just being normal
(this is karaoke night w/ some friends). The kneeling gangster is one of my roommates and I'm superman w/ an afro :)

I put in my headphones and found this song in one of my playlists and I realized that there is really only one thing I can do with ALL of this. Share it with God. He wants to hear my struggles. He wants to hold my heart as it breaks for my roommates. He wants to wipe their tears as they fall from my eyes. He wants to be my mind and body when mine are too sore to keep going. In fact, He's asking us to surrender these things to Him.

He says that we're BEAUTIFUL the mess we are and he hears our miseries as melodies because He loves that we're trusting Him with our brokeness. He is ENOUGH!


Better Than an Hallelujah ~Amy Grant (with emphasis added by me)

God loves a lullaby
In a mother's tears in the dead of night
Better than a Hallelujah sometimes

God loves the drunkard's cry
The soldier's plea not to let him die
Better than a Hallelujah sometimes

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah

The woman holding on for life
The dying man giving up the fight
Are better than a Hallelujah sometimes

The tears of shame for what's been done
The silence when the words won't come
Are better than a Hallelujah sometimes

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah

Better than a church bell ringing
Better than a choir singing out, singing out

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah